lauren laughs

even though farhan and roohi were married and could actually look each other in the eye and talk face to face, their actual wedding, or shaadi, was two days later. i missed this too as my inexplicable karachi illness caused me to pass out and fun things like that. staying home was not so bad, as helena too was ill and together we were tasked with preparing the wedding room… or as we called it, the love nest. farhan’s sister gave us a bag of rose petals and instructed us on how to sprinkle the petals all around the wedding bed. i kid you not! we did our job well. it wouldn’t surprise me if i was asked back to karachi to prepare other wedding rooms in the near future… (ehem, urooj…)

after farhan’s nika ceremony, joost, helena, zoe and i escaped town and drove about an hour southwest (i think) to the shore. we spent some time in a fishing community with men working on beautiful boats. we even stayed for tea, which was delicious. this was probably one of the least touristy places near karachi one could find (not that there are lots of western tourists anyway) and i was loving it.

some of the men and women use henna in their hair to give it a red color. in this case, the fisherman was likely trying to emulate one of the prophets. at least that’s my guess. some men wear beards to be like certain prophets as well. if you’re following a prophet closely, you apparently follow his grooming habits as well.

unfortunately, this was the day i started getting pretty ill. i don’t know if it was the heat or the food or what… but i completely lost my appetite and ate nothing but tea and crackers for the next two days. sadly, i missed two of farhan and roohi’s ceremonies because of it. here is a pic of roohi at the mehendi (henna) party. talk about glowing! wish i had been there. instead i was at (farhan’s) home writing letters and listing to podcasts.

farhan’s nika was on a hot monday morning at this lovely mosque not too far from his house. the nika ceremony is when the bride and groom sign the marriage contract. farhan went into the mosque a single man, and walked out a married man.

the women and men are separated in the mosque. we all gathered in one room with roohi, who seemed pretty calm about the whole thing. she’s super cool. the ceremony began and her dad and an attorney and a religious leader walked in and read the marriage contract to roohi, which she agreed to. the men walked out, went to farhan and said a bunch of things in arabic that i couldn’t understand, and then farhan too agreed to the contract. presto-change-oh… the two are married! farhan was then brought into the room with all the women where he sat next to roohi and the two of them had to do a number of things. in this picture they’re both covered and then they look into a mirror to see each others reflection. this is supposed to be the first way they see one another, but of course that wasn’t really the case. anyway, it was a nice touch. what people couldn’t see was that the newly weds were actually playing footsie in the mosque… ah! like i said, roohi is super cool.

so while all of this is very exciting, i was having a little pity party for myself. i typically cry at weddings, and this was no different. but this time my tears were in part because it became very real to me that i was going to have to share farhan with someone else! i mean, i’m a sharing person… and technically i’ve been sharing farhan all along. but he’s like my brother. and you know how that familial bond is a little different. plus, this was the onset of my paki illness, though i didn’t realize it at the time. so yeah. while i’m smiling in this pic, there was a lot of pouting going on too. i’m just being honest. the bonus, of course, is that i get to chill with roohi now too… which makes it all worthwhile. not that this is about me…

it was tough to get out of the house and do any shopping since farhan’s family was clearly preoccupied with all the planning that goes along with two weddings. fortunately some family friends offered to take us around. i think farhan’s family was a little nervous because the city had shut down the previous day from riots and fires following the death and funeral of the shia priest that was bombed days before (a pizza hut and a petrol station were both burned down near some of the events we were attending), but joost, zoe and i felt plenty safe with our trusty driver asef (not to be confused with arzoo’s husband asef).

first we went to the sunday market near the arabian sea. before we could even stop the car children swarmed around begging to carry our things for us. one urdu phrase i used a lot was “nahiin chehia” for “i don’t want…” (i’m sure i spelled that wrong). the market was open air, but with fabric tarps tied together for shade. i did more people watching than anything, though i did manage to haggle with some men over a few items. buying food from steet vendors is always a no-no, but the roasted corn seemed safe enough. corn kernels were mixed with coarse sand which sped up the cooking i think. the sand was then sifted out and the corn was seasoned and hot and yummy. great afternoon treat.

after leaving the market, our driver overheard zoe, joost and i plotting on ways to escape the house to see more of the city. eager to please his foreign patrons, asef turned to ask if we had a camera handy. we asked where he was taking us, but he just put a finger to his lips indicating our destination was a secret. after an always adventurous ride (the traffic in karachi is worse than south america and (according to joost) africa), asef parked the car outside a mosque and signaled for us to follow. as we walked to the entrance we saw the mosque was actually much larger than it appeared from the road. we took off our shoes and entered karachi’s largest mosque, the white-marbled masjid-e-tooba. its single dome is simple, elegant, and supposedly the largest of its kind in the world. asef turned to us and asked, “you happy?” yes. very happy indeed.